20 Smart and Witty Facebook Statuses You Can Use

Photo Courtesy: byJoeLodge

Having a hard time thinking of your next Facebook status? Want to make others laugh at your wit and strong sarcasm? Browse through these hilarious one-liners that will let everyone know who’s the boss.

1. There’s no place like home, unless you’re homeless, in which case everywhere is like home.

2. I know the world isn’t going to end in 2012 because my yogurt expires in 2013.

3. I like to name my iPod ‘Titanic’ so when it says ‘Syncing Titanic’ I click cancel and it makes me feel like a hero.

4. I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

5. Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, if it weren’t for Christmas, we would all be Jewish.

6. People say that love is in every corner…gosh! Maybe I’m moving in circles.

7. Make love, not war. Get married and do both.

8. Statistically 5/4th of people have trouble with fractions.

9. Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us want to leave footprints on their face.

10. My wife and me are inseparable. Sometimes, it takes three or four people to pull us apart.