6 Ways to Win Your Stepchildren’s Hearts

4. Don’t do what their father used to do with them

Their father’s place is something you can never take completely because they are related to each other by blood. Don’t try to be him; be yourself and be a completely nice father in your own way. Avoid doing things which their father used to do with them as this will only bring back his memories to them and they will make you feel even more alienated by comparing you with him.

5. Nurture them as your own offspring

Don’t insist them on calling you ‘dad’; let the feeling develop gradually. As much as you are a friend to them, you also have to maintain the balance between fatherhood and friendship. Act responsibly, be there for the kids when they need you, share their joys and sorrows, build them up as much as you can, help them with their homework, offer advice, explain how things work, organize their day, and so on. If you do all this with the expectation of immediate reciprocation, then you wouldn’t succeed. But if you do it because it’s the right thing to do, you would win their hearts slowly but steadily.

6. Don’t try to impress them with gifts

You can’t buy love, definitely not from your stepkids. If you try to win them over with gifts, they will love the things you gift and not you. Forget accepting you as their stepdad, they may end up manipulating you to get things they want, which will spoil the kids for life. Once you stop gifting them, they may start disliking you. Always remember, no relationship can foster on material grounds; relationships bloom only because of the people and emotions involved.